4 Days, 1 Hr, 19 Min :)

Hey Everyone,

So I had my last check-up at the doctor before my c-section on Friday! She said I've definitely dropped, but I'm still kinda closed, but close...having contractions everyday now, real ones- not braxton hicks...so I guess if they come regularly I need to go to the hospital.

I'm very excited for Friday, but scared also. I can't believe I will meet my little boy!!! It's so strange to me (still) that I'm going to be a mommy! It seems just like yesterday that I was peeing on that pregnancy test...scared to death! LOL....longest yet shortest nine months of my life!

So how am I feeling?

I am very tired lately and I ache...especially my right ribcage where he likes to kick...and then my right hip (the replacement) has been giving me some pain the past few days. The doctor said thats probably because he's dropped and he's SO low... I've just got to take it easy this week.

Jim and I made two trips to the hospital this last week...one was Wednesday night. I thought my water had broke...It's so weird being pregnant with your first...you have no clue what you're doing or what things feel/should feel like. Anyways, obviously my water had no broke...I probably just peed LOL.

The second trip to the hospital was on Saturday night. I was having really painful contractions, ten minutes apart for two hours straight. We called the doctor at like 12- midnight and the on-call dr said to go to the hospital for a labor check and check to see if the baby was ok- so that it would be stressed out. That was scary to hear. I'd hate for Baby Jack to be stressed out- his heartrate dropping or whatnot. But, that wasn't the case. His heart rate was fine and the contractions actually stopped once I was in the room....which I hear is actually really common--- your adrenaline starts kicking in and you want to run away so your body stops labor I guess? Who knows....either way they monitored me til about 2 am...then sent me home. She offered me some Demerol for the discomfort, which I was hesitant about but took because I haven't been sleeping well at all and in pain. OMG I love that stuff....made me feel happy LOL. I woke up the next morning wide awake, feeling like my old self. :) It was nice. Of course, I'm back to being uncomfortable but that's expected....just something I have to deal with :)

My mom, sister and stepdad come into town tomorrow! I'm so excited--- and I get a twinnie day with Nicole on Wednesday :) YAYS!

36 Weeks, 5 Days, 24 Days Left

YAY- So, yesterday was a full day- two dr appointments.

First, we had our last ultrasound with Dr. Helm. Jack is basically out of room LOL…sad for both him and I…he’s cramped and I’m hurting from his strong movements. Their guess-estimate for his weight is 7lbs, 1 oz. The ultrasound was a little painful for me because of the PUPPPS rash that I still have…with that and the stretchmarks, my skin is super sensitive so the goo they use for the machine kind of burned the entire time! And these aren’t normal ultrasounds…they take like 30 minutes. But, it was the last one, so it’s over with J

Our second appointment, we finally got to meet the doctor who will delivery Jack. I love this new office that I’m going to now…Fresno Women’s Medical Group…They are really nice and really listen to what you have to say- concerns and all. My doctor looked over my chart before meeting with me, asked me about the surgeries I’ve had and my past and examined my range of motion that I have now with the hip replacement and determined that a c-section would be her recommendation…which is excellent for me because that’s what I want. If she would have done the same routine and recommended a natural birth, I would be scared to death, but would have accepted it because, unlike the other doctor I had, this woman LISTENED to me and really looked at all aspects of my body- that means so much to me as a patient.

Anyways, Jack will be here on November 4 J My surgery is at 11am…so Jim and I have to be there at 9. It is another surgery, but I really don’t care about that…I really think the surgery will be less nerve-racking than the thought of my hip being damaged or having any other kind of complications that will put me in recovery even longer than a c-section.

One downside to yesterday was that since I am having the c-section and I’m pregnant, my chances for a blood clot go up even more, so I DO have to go on the Lovonox injections in my stomach L It’ll only be once a day for ten days…but I guess I have to compromise somewhere, right? I’m going into the office tomorrow (Thursday) afternoon before our baby class to get a small “tutorial” of how to give myself the injection…I’ve had Lovonox before when I got a blood clot after my hip replacement, but I didn’t give the injections to myself…I barely even looked at the needle…I had my mom do it for me. Jim said he could probably help me out but I do want to know how to do it myself in case I need to. Just the fact that I have to stick a needle into my stomach…with jack there…freaks me out so much L But, again, if it was dangerous for baby, I know the doctor wouldn’t allow it…so it should be OK. I just have to get over the fear and do it.

34 Weeks, 6 Days, 37 Days left!

UPDATE :)

Ok, so I finally got in to see the new doctor yesterday...kinda...I saw the nurse practitioner, but she and everyone in the office are just really nice-- not like the other office I was going to. The appointment was very long because I had to wait- they were waiting for my records to be faxed over but they never came in...luckily, they saw me anyways!

She examined my Puppp- which is now basically chest-toe...hands, arms, legs, feet, belly, etc etc. Luckily, my face, neck and private areas have been spared. Needless to say, she was shocked that my previous dr had prescribed me the clobetasol...and highly recommended that I stopped using it...so thats what I've done. She said benedril should work just fine, even though it'll make me tired, and it has! The benedril actually works better than the clobetasol, lasts longer, and I don't have to worry about harming Jack.

Then it came down to getting all my past surgery information and instead of just repeating a long list of operations, I handed her a list I had written up for her-- it's easier :) Then, she asked me the most amusing question: "So, did you have a scheduled c-section planned with your previous doctor?" HAHAHAHA EXACTLY! I explained the problem I was having with the other doctor and explained further that I really just wanted a second opinion on the c-section idea...someone's opinion who would listen and examine my case/past rather than just going off of "old-fashioned" ideas. So, I meet the actual doctor next week and we'll discuss the c-section then :)

overall, I really really like this office better and even though it is late in my pregnancy, I am happy I switched :)

Trying to Stay Strong....

Happy 5 am...

Before we get down to the nitty-gritty stuff that I got on here to write about...just thought I'd share that I had a very odd dream last night....Jim's cousin bought Baby Jack his very own Russian Unicorn as a baby gift!!!!! LOLOLOL Love it! If you don't get the joke, watch this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YjaZNYSt7o0.

ANYWAYS...new problems have risen. While I was in Prescott last weekend for my baby shower, I woke up incredibly itchy on my stomach...it was horrible! My body always seems to do weird things when I go home anymore--- really bad migraines in the morning, stuffy nose, etc. I thought this was just an added "Going-home-symptom" but apparently not. It's just been getting worse- the redness, swelling, and itching. I finally went to the doctor today because it's just becoming unbearable...can't even sleep because I wake up feeling like I got bit by a million bug bites on my stomach surrounding my belly button. That's the best way to describe it.

So, I had originally done some Google research and found this pregnancy condition abbreviated PUPPP...it's a pregnancy rash that can be so extreme sometimes that they have to induce labor to treat the itching with high dose steroids! Anyways, this condition is exactly what I have. While at the doctor she asked me if it was spreading anywhere besides my stomach, which at the time wasn't...but now it is even though I got a steroid medication for the itching now (clobetasol). It's terrible! My stomach looks like I have leprosy....and now I'm not only itching there, but also on my arms, legs, back....I thought pregnancy made some women feel beautiful? I haven't felt this ugly in a really long time. I've been holding back the tears all day but last night before bed I really broke down and Jim was really nice about it...I love him so much and that's one of the things I really do love about him-- he doesn't judge me or make me feel anything less...I can truly tell that he feels bad for me and wishes he could take some of the burden of carrying our child...I believe it too...if he could, he would take all the pain away.

I guess it's just hard because I feel like everything always has to go wrong--and I always get the weird, f-ed up stuff that nobody's ever heard of-- I had Bell's Palsy in high school and now this...both really annoying and embarrassing. I can't help but wonder what I did in a past life to deserve so much pain and just one thing right after another!!!!!!!!! Nothing is ever simple...

OK...there's my bitch-fit :) I'm done...I'm gonna go soak in an oatmeal bath and see if I can't get back to sleep :) NUH NITE friends...thanks for listening to me vent!!!!!!

32 Weeks, 4 Days, 53 Days Left

So I am really up and down today...actually, the only time I was really "up" was when I had my ultrasound...got to see Jack :)

Here's a pic of his foot! Isn't it cute!!!?? This foot is ALWAYS kicking to the left of my belly button. I love it.

So here is the vent session that I need to get off my chest...

-I don't like gaining weight...I'm 147 lbs!!!! :( I feel huge!!!

-I have lots of ugly stretch marks even though I lather up with palmers cocoa butter everyday!!!

-A certain person (no names) is driving the hell out of me!

-I'm tired of being alone!!!

-and another thing, but I'm not gonna say it because it's a little too close to heart...

SOOOOO ANYWAYS....Jack weighs 4 lbs now...he's in 40th percentile for being 32 weeks, so thats not too bad... :) Yays for my growing boy :)

Crib and Nursery :)

32 Weeks, 2 Days, 55 Days Left- Second Scare

Yesterday was definitely an up and down kind of day! It was nice because I had some alone/chill time in the morning while Jim was out playing frisbee golf and then we spent the afternoon together watching Sin City and having lunch...but the whole time and all day Friday I was having pains- menstrual-like cramps, gasey pains without the gas, and then pressure and pain in my pelvis to where I'd have to double over...so there was some concern.

Now, anyone who truly knows me knows that I am stubborn as ever when it comes to going to the emergency room or even an urgent care...it's like pulling teeth, even though I know it's always worth it- either you find something or it puts your mind at ease!

So, to put our minds at ease (since this is our first baby and we have no clue what is going on), we went to the OB OR last night around 4pm. Luckily they got us right in and hooked me up the monitor and started recording the babies heart beat, movements and contractions. At first there were no contractions, only Jack going crazy on my bladder lol...but after about fifteen minutes and some hydration, I was having contractions every 3 minutes! They were small but I could definitely feel them.

They tested to see if my water broke, which I knew it didnt....but let them test anyways...then they checked if I was dialating, which I wasn't...thank goodness!! So, they gave me this medication, not sure the name of it, to stop the contractions and it worked. It made me feel real shakey and my heart race, but I've only had two contractions since 7:30 last night, so YAYS :)

Another up moment after we got home though--- Jim's mom and brother dropped off our new crib! It's SOOOO cute! I am going to post pics of that and the nursery in the next blog today :)

Thanks for listening to our little "scare #2" lol I'm so glad Jack's gonna stay in a bit longer- he needs to continue "cooking" lol.

31 Weeks, 5 Days, 59 Days left

So I'm almost 32 weeks...had my 31 weeks checkup today and it went horribly. I met with the actual doctor yet again and she said flat out (about the c-section): "No...your leg is no reason to go through major surgery...you do realize it's major surgery?" and she didn't even wait for me to answer or say anything. She acting like I was completely retarded about my own body! I wanted to kick her in the face and tell her to shove her opinion up her...anyways! I'm switching doctors. I've decided it today- after todays appointment, I don't want to see her again, let alone have her deliver my baby! She doesn't listen to anything I have to say. It's NOT just my leg...it's my leg, hip, pelvis...everything! I am truly concerned and she doesn't give my concerns the time of day because she's too busy shoving us through her line. It's ridiculous and I'm tired of it. I may be this far along but I need to see someone who will respect me as a patient and not just a number. Even if they truly suggest a natural birth- FINE!!! But listen to me first and take an interest into my past first, not just one little aspect of my life.... So, I've been doing research this afternoon and will make a couple calls tomorrow to get this ball rolling.

On a better note, our nursery is finally almost finished- well, the painting and murals are finished- thanks to our friends!!! It's beautiful!!! I will post pics later :)

I also finish my externship this coming monday- so that will be a nice stress reliever and i can just relax til the baby comes.

My baby showers are coming up as well as my maternity pictures, courtesy of my lovely cousin Andrea. I'm soooo excited! I even bought a new dress today to wear for it today! It's such a cute dress! Oh, which reminds me of another thing that pissed me off today- (the tears and emotions have all turned to anger lately lol) Jim and I went to Khols today because we had a $10 gift card to put towards any purchase and i wanted to look at the dresses...so we're checking out with this dress that I love and the cashier (who is pregnant herself, about 4 months) basically says that she hates the selection of maternity clothing at Khols and that she'll never wear anything like it...basically INSULTING the item I'm purchasing!! I know it doesn't sound like much, but she was just completely stuck-up!

Wow...okay, thats enough venting...Hope you are all having a fabulous day...I'm gonna go CHILL and watch a movie until Jim gets home for dinner :) Thanks for listening to me rant lol

Love you all!!!!

27 weeks, 7 days, 85 days left!

I had my 27 week check-up on Wednesday…went way better than I had planned. I still have the same doctor and have decided to stick with it rather than changing during my third trimester. I talked to her during this last appointment and insisted that the c-section is the best thing for me, mentally and physically. Jim and I talked to his cousin who is an orthopedic surgeon…he agreed 100%. And, I feel if prissy rich women can choose this alternative to avoid the pain of pregnancy, then I should be able to choose it just for the sake of avoiding all the risks that are involved.

So, aside from that, baby Jack is growing and kicking like crazy. I have crazy nicknames for him when he kicks too much or too hard- beast, alien baby, psycho lol. I’m sure he likes it lol. He does have his sweet moments though—like when it’s just us two—im lounging on the couch, slouched, my belly protruding upward. He’ll push outward along my belly button, then I’ll run my hand along it and he’ll do it again—and we’ll take turns doing this as if it’s some kind of blind game. I can’t see him, he can’t see me. We can only feel the love between us. It makes me tear up sometimes.

I’m in my 3^rd trimester now so that means I have doctor appointments every two weeks now…plus, I’m still seeing the specialist for ultrasounds to see how he’s growing…which I have another appointment Tuesday. I’m kinda hoping those stay at monthly appointments but we’ll see! J

24 weeks

Hey everyone,

this update is a little later than I suppose I promised on facebook...but I haven't really felt motivated. It's 6 am and I can't sleep....again. I heard and read that pregnancy insomnia is common, so I'm not necessarily worried about it. I think I won't get worried unless it continues into August because on the 9th I start my externship, basically a full-time job without pay...bummer! lol.

Anyways!! Back to Jack....

I had another appointment with my baby doctor this last Wednesday, July 20. I was 23 weeks and I FINALLY met my doctor. She seems nice enough but she completely dismissed what I wanted to talk to her about- my concerns with delivery. I wanted more reassurance and interaction than what I received. I honestly think I should have a c-section and whether it's out of fear of my hip dislocating or whatnot, I think it's legit. But, once I brought the subject up, all she had to say was: Oh, your hips have nothing to do with your delivery, your hip will be fine.

The end.

OK...well, how come everyone I know says your hips move and they spread out and whatnot? I'm so very confused what to do here because I don't want to change doctors but I feel it is definitely necessary now...plus, Jim wants to change also. We both feel like I'm just a number there-- they didn't even have in my chart that I'd had my hip replaced! It's a joke.

All drama aside, baby Jack is doing well...heartbeat was at 150, which I guess is good.

He's definitely moving a lot more lately! I absolutely love it- can't get enough of it. I'm sure all you other mommy's felt the same? I think it's the only part of pregnancy that I do enjoy...everything else sucks and I hate it lol. BUT, I do know that the end result will be more rewarding than what my body and emotions are having to go through. :)

20 Weeks, 4 Days, 137 Days Left

SO, I haven't written in awhile. A lot has been going on...we found out IT'S A BOY!! His name is going to be Jack David Smith. :)

We had a little bit of a scare my last doctor appointment...my second prenatal blood test results came back and one of the results was positive for a neural tube defect. For those of you who don't know what that is, it's basically if there is something wrong with the spine, stomach or abdomen- like if there's a whole or something- the most common type of birth defect for this defect is Spina Bifida. All my doctor would tell us (last Thursday 6/23) was that we were at risk for the baby having a defect like this and that she made us an appointment with a specialist. Well that, of course, scared me to death.

We went to see this specialist this morning and it definitely wasn't as bad as I thought it would be! We got a complete ultrasound of every aspect of his body- measuring everything from my ovaries to each valve of his heart! It was really neat-- probably took a good 45 minutes! We then had to see a genetic counselor and she was really great. She said that the max of the AFP test is 25.0 and that would be where you wouldn't be at risk for the neural tube defect...my blood test showed a 25.2~! This is fantastic news-- so it's more likely just a fluke and nothings wrong with baby. Everything on the ultrasound looked good and it's such a low number that we basically don't have anything to worry about. :) YAYS!!!

2 Years

Hey everyone,

so today is May 19, 2011. It is two years to the day that I had my total hip replacement. I can't believe it's already been two years, yet at the same time, it feels a lot longer than that. I was in a completely different life practically than I am now- feel like a different person almost and I don't know how I feel about that one.

I remember having the conversation with my orthopedic surgeon Jan 2009 about doing the hip replacement...one of my biggest concerns was- would I be able to have children. He said it wouldn't be a problem because of the type of replacement he was putting in...i never thought in a million years that in two years time that i would be pregnant with my first kid!

I know the female body changes drastically when she's pregnant, but I guess I'm not sure how the hips change, if at all. So far, my hip hasn't given me any problems, even though I have gained "weight". I have a significant baby bump going on, but I haven't gained any actual weight...I've actually lost two pounds. My hip has been my most struggling surgery yet- both emotionally and physically. I know it's hard to believe because i've had my leg and arm lengthened, but...I dont' remember those surgeries so it's hard to count those.

I'm so afraid that this delivery that's coming up in November, six months from now, that something will happen to my hip and I absolutely don't even want to take the chance...I have my third doctors appointment this coming Monday and i'm going to bring her an x-ray of my hip and discuss with her my concerns and suggest a c-section. I understand that natural labor is better or whatnot, i dont care. Yes, I care about the baby, but I have to take care of myself also because with my hip working perfectly afterward, it is going to be really difficult to take care of myself and a newborn and I can't deal with that.

I'm feeling very overwhelmed lately....

13 weeks, Day 4, 186 days left

Excitement!
Before I start on the news from the weekend, I have fantastical, wonderful, exciting news! I felt the baby move for the first time! IT was absolutely amazing…but weird. J It felt like a little flutter but it was a strong flutter—if that makes any sense. I was talking to my friend Ashley here and she gave me a suggestion- to push where I had felt the “kick” and I should be able to feel it move- like a ripple almost- a wave. So, last night, Jim and I tried that- and we felt it!! IT was amazing and shocking! I’m used to feeling it on other pregnant women’s bellies, but this is my first pregnancy- it was really weird…basically indescribable.


Baby Daddy:
So…this weekend, I went to a Fresno Grizzlies baseball game with Jim’s mom. We talked a lot but one thing that did come up was parenthood…for obvious reasons. I told her I was 100% confident Jim will be an excellent dad. Sure, I’ve seen him with other kids and how reacts and such, but I think the number one thing that made me so sure was how he is with Roxy- our vizsla/lab mix. Roxy is part of our family and we consider her our daughter. Dogs are a lot like kids—they need to be fed and taught but they also need love, support and care. When they don’t feel good, they want to be cuddled just like a sick child. Jim is amazing with Roxy and, to me that reflects a lot on how he will be to his own daughter or son.


Updates:
I’m in my second trimester now! And just as the baby book I read predicted, the nauseas has decreased a ton! It’s still there every now and then so I have to continue the medication about every other day, but I love it. On the downside, I do feel more tired lately- even if I haven’t done a whole lot that day, by one or two in the evening, I’m just exhausted. Oh! I finally gained weight! I am not fluctuating between 131-132…so I’ve gained about 2-3 pounds J Yays.

Week 12, Day 3

(Just so you know, I'm gonna post the dates that I originally started with because I can't change my calender on my phone to match what I want...it doesn't really matter anyways I guess. )

So, last night and the night before, I had two more pregnancy dreams. Last night's was pretty simple and very hard to remember...all I DO remember is that I had a daughter.

The night before last, was really odd...

I was on my way to the hospital with Nicole (my sister), my mom, my brother Mike and an old friend's mom, Shannon. I don't know why, but Jim wasn't there. We were in a van and I knew we had a long way to drive.

We stopped at Shannon's house- she and I got out while everyone else left for the hospital because I wasn't pregnant anymore! But, my sister was! She ends up having a 2 lb baby girl in the dream. The dream continues with me helping Shannon with her in-home day care center. There are babies everywhere! I feel really out of control. There is this one big baby who is trying to sleep in a really small round crib but he is too big for the crib, so he keeps falling out and I still put him back in as if he should fit. Shannon asks me to go make juice for all the babies but I don't remember how to make it!

It was very bizarre...but I thought it was interesting that both pregnancy dreams, both babies were girls :) Maybe that's a sign?

Cravings!!!

I think my food cravings are going a little bipolar at times. At first, I only craved fruit and fruit only. But now, it's completely random. For example, this last weekend it was a mixture between pickles (sweet and dill) and bacon! YUM. And whenever I ate watermelon and potatoes, even though I wasn't particularly craving them, they both tasted like heaven! (not together of course) :)

Week 9, Day 5

Today was our first ultrasound!

We learned several things:

1. found out the baby is only 9 weeks rather than 10, so that would explain why I randomly changed the date in the title to an earlier date than the other blogs.

2. There is only one in there= YAY!!!! haha

3. Our baby is very active. The whole time he/she was bouncing around, jumping, waving, just happy as a little clam. :) haha

4. According to our physician's assistant, our baby looks like a frog :) haha

It was completely amazing looking at our baby! I've seen an ultrasound before, but it's completely, 100% different when it's your own! I was just in shock and wonder! After she had measured it and done all the pictures, she let us watch it for a little bit and that's when we saw it move so much-- I started to cry because he/she was so amazing. I have that little amazing being living and growing inside of me! He/She depends on me for their survival- more so than when it will be out of the womb...I don't know if that made sense, but it makes sense in my head. :)

Overall, it was just an amazing morning- I couldn't stop thinking about him/her all day long. I wish I could feel the movement-- but it's too soon for that.

Week 10, Day 5, 206 Days Left

The bump:

Well, the belly seems bigger everyday but I’m sure that’s my imagination- possibly- who knows. I haven’t actually started measuring it and I’m not sure that’s something I even want to do yet.

Weight:

Usually weight is a touchy subject for women but when you’re pregnant, who cares, right? Well, I think before I got prego, I was around 129, 130…I’ll admit it. J Since then, the past 6-7 weeks, my weight has fluctuated a bit but it always seems to return to 129, which I’m happy about because I don’t want to gain too much during the first trimester. I heard it’s best if you don’t.

Pregnancy in Heels:

Does anyone else watch this show?? I absolutely love it- it’s entertaining and makes me really glad I’m not as superficial as some of these women on this show. (It’s on Tuesday nights on Bravo if you’re interested). Anyways, there was this woman on last night’s episode who (supposedly) weighted around 100 lbs before she got pregnant and at the time of the show, she was in her ninth month and she weighed 180 lbs!!!! That means she gained 80 lbs during her pregnancy! And, she’s not really tall, she’s probably my height- around 5’2”, if not shorter, which means she should have only gained between 25-30 pounds, not 80. How does this happen? She was in total junk-food-crazy denial! Even though I’ve been occasionally craving those yummy fluffy white mini marshmallows, this will NOT HAPPEN TO ME!!! J

9 Weeks, 5 Days 213 Days Left

“Dreams”

Dreams are so important for self discovery at any age. I’m not talking about physical hopes and dreams one longs for the future, but the actual visions we conjure up while we sleep. These dreams, if we’re lucky enough to remember them, present us a keyhole to peep through a locked door into our soul, revealing our thoughts, fears and emotions we normally couldn’t express during consciousness. Some dream themes are so common amongst a lot of people because a lot of us have the same fears and/or fantasies rolling around upstairs: naked dreams, chase dreams, teeth dreams, flying dreams, falling dreams, and test dreams. Fear is a normal part of the human psyche, whether a person is willing to admit their fears or not. And just as your life is changing constantly, so do your fears, and most likely, your dreams.

My life has been changing a lot lately (I’m not going to state the obvious), so when I starting having pregnancy dreams, I wasn’t surprised. One night a couple of weeks ago, I had two pregnancy dreams. The first one, a friend of mine (not naming names because it’s not important) got really mad at me for one reason or another and kicked me in the stomach until I miscarried. It was quite disturbing but not really a fear of mine, for I know that person is happy for me and she’s not even a violent person! The second dream I had that night was more frightening because it “could happen”…I had twins. This is a legitimate fear of mine and thanks to my wonderful friends and family who love to tease me, so now I have a fear of having twins. Now, I seriously don’t believe that I’m having twins, but it’s still a possibility. By the way, the twins in the dream were both girls.

Last night, I was reading a new book my friend Krystle got me for my birthday called The Pregnancy Bible. In this fabulous book, there is a section on dreams, which inspired me to write on this topic. In this section, they gave a list of common pregnancy dreams so I thought I’d share them:

-The pregnancy isn't real and that you will give birth to nothing, or simply deflate.

-You give birth to a baby animal, or even some mundane household object.

-Your baby is damaged or deformed in some way.

One solution the book suggests for getting rid of these types of nightmares is thinking positively rather than worrying- especially right before you go to sleep. Think about cradling your baby, cuddling and loving it rather than something going wrong with it. I think its good advice so we’ll see how that goes. I’m curious to see what other dreams my unconsciousness will conjure up in the next seven months!

Week 9, Day 4.....214 Days Left

It's amazing how fast your life can change just by peeing on a stick...well, not literally of course, but finding out that way...Six weeks ago, I was shocked, upset, and angry that the little positive sign showed up rather than a negative. I think I expressed every emotion except happiness, excitement and joy- the feelings you're supposed to have when you're expecting. But, that's what happens when pregnancy was the last thing you wanted.

Needless to say, my thoughts and emotions have changed drastically...partly because of my wonderful boyfriend, Jim. He had the same reaction as I did- angry and upset- not at me of course- but at the situation. But we had a decision to make-- we could either be happy or be upset--make this a positive "situation" or a negative one. Why not turn it into a positive? So, that's what we did!

Now, Jim is probably more excited than I am to be a daddy, mainly because I'm still in my first trimester and am having pains, aches, nausea, and extremely moody.

This is our first baby- we have no clue what we're doing but we are learning together- one thing I'm happy about it- this happened with the right person- (which he says the same thing about me). We are each others' best friend and love each other more than anything- why not share that with someone we both created?

So, I'm 9 weeks (according to my last period). Jim thinks I'm farther along because I'm already showing pretty well and I'm showing all the signs and symptoms of someone who is 12-13 weeks along...BUT...we won't know officially until our first ultrasound, which is one April 22-- a week and a half from now. We are very excited about that appointment because we'll get to see what the little guy/gal looks like!

The belly- so, like I said, I'm definitely showing. I hate wearing my jeans so I bought my first pair of maternity pants today because 1- I'll need them eventually and 2- They're uber comfortable, so why not?! :) My belly button is uber strange...I usually have a semi-deep belly button but it's not as deep, which is kinda cool. I'm using that Palmers Stretch Mark lotion everyday to prevent stretch marks- I'm hoping that will work.

Cravings- I don't know what the superstition says about relating certain food cravings with determining the sex of the baby, but I am definitely craving fruit...all the time! I can't get enough of it. Greasy, meaty foods gross me out (except bacon).

Names- So, I'm not disclosing any information yet but we pretty much decided early on what our "girl name" would be...so that wasn't an issue...it was the 'boy name" that was a pain! Jim and I both kept blanking on boy names and we didn't like anything that we saw online. The problem with figuring out names is Jim's last name-- it's very...common...so we didn't want a common and or traditional first name. Since we had already decided a girl name, we were excited to have a baby girl...but I wanted to be excited about having a boy also-- having a name ready (I think) bring its more excitement....so we finally decided on a boy name today! It's really adorable, but still a name that will fit an adult-- which is important.